Merry Christmas and goodbye to an old friend

Merry Christmas!  We are celebrating a day early because I have to work tomorrow and Sunday.  We are having a good day.  I can't believe how fast the boys tore through their presents though.  I feel like there wasn't enough even though they had a ton of stuff.  Does anyone else feel like that at Christmas?  All of your careful planning,shopping, and wrapping.........and it is all over in minutes.  It was worth it though.  When they woke up this morning and saw that finally Santa was here.  Now we are playing with toys and some of us our still in pajamas.  I won't say who.  I won't tell on you Jack.

about 30 seconds into it

 

 

 

pretty smile

these are the coolest things 

On another note, we decide to say goodbye to an old friend today.  The crib.  I am not sure how I feel about it.  Charley is way past ready to be in a big boy bed but I am not ready for it to be packed away.  What does it mean?  Will it ever hold another precious child?  Who knows but I can't keep Charley in there forever. I know poor me right?  Like I am the first mother to ever feel this and I know this is just the beginning of things that my baby is outgrowing. I will have to post some pictures of Charley in his big boy bed.  I will after I get over my mourning.

**disclaimer**clarification***

I love my life and sometimes looking back on my posts it sounds a little doom and gloom.  I am really not like that.  It feels good to write out my feelings here and sometimes I am not having the best day but after I write I feel better.  Also, a couple of these were written after taking an ambien.  That is my big secret sometimes I take one on the nights before I have to work because I am so worried I won't go to sleep early enough.  Anyway, I don't always recommend that you get on your computer after taking an ambien.  There have been some facebook incidences too.  I'll be honest.  Actually, I am always honest.  Kind of a downfall sometimes.  Too much info.  This post was not written with the help of ambien though just banana shakes and coffee.  Okay enough, talk to you later.

nightly dinner battle

Well, I wish the quality of picture was better but this is Jack sitting at the table.  Notice he is alone.  Yeah, everyone else in our family finished like days ago.  Don't let the fork in his mouth fool you.  He is just tormenting me and teasing me.  That fork is still as clean as when it came out of the drawer.  There will be no food on that fork for at least an hour from when this picture was taken.  This is our almost every night ritual.  I am sticking to my guns though and making him stay at the table until he eats what I have asked him to.  Usually just one or two of each thing on his plate.  I am just hoping it gets better.  That kid is so strong willed.  Tonight's time was about 1 hour 50 minutes until he finally ate his cold little morsels of food.  Then he high fived me and ran up to his room to start the nightly dance party.  


If any of my 3 followers (oh darn, I am one and my huband is another,,,, there is no hope for us) have any helpful ideas or funny way they got their scary underweight, stubborn kid to eat please share.  Those chairs are starting to hurt my butt.

random

I have been avoiding writing here for a while.  Not sure why.  A combination of writer's block, melancholy, and I wish that I didn't add the stupid scale thing to my blog.  Now it just reminds me of how much weight I haven't lost when I look at it or think about writing a new post.  I don't know why it is so hard for me to lose it.  I have been working out and eating less.  Shouldn't it just fall off?  Also, I all but gave up beer completely.  It seems like when a guy does that he instantly loses the beer gut.  Oh well, we just got back from Mexico late Sunday night so this week is full of just getting back to normal and also getting ready for Christmas........but diet?  I will be back to kick your fat butt soon. 


I have things that I am stressed about right now like some things I'd rather not say here yet, money, making sure everyone has a good Christmas, job situation, and a number of other things that really in the whole big scheme of life are not that big of a deal.  I need to let some things go.  I think God is trying to show me how I need to count my blessings right now.  One of my friend's brothers passed away yesterday at the age of 42.  He had 2 small children.  I can't even imagine what that family is going through right now and to have that happen  near the holidays makes it seem even worse somehow.
 

Also, I just found out that one of my cousins who is pregnant with her 3rd precious baby just found out that she was having twin girls but then had all the joy taken away within moments because her girls are conjoined at the chest and share a heart and liver.  She is 5 months along right now and not sure how long she will be able to carry them.  Please follow her blog and pray for her at:

 stevens twins linked with love

 With all of that going on it makes me feel really bad for the silly things that I let get me down.

Also, we just got back from Mexico!  What a great time.  I can't believe how fast it went but I was there and I had a great time.  I even got some sun that Michigan hasn't totally sucked away yet.

dinner for schmucks

So in short I am going to make sure and count my blessings today and start having a more positive attitude.  I think it would help though if I had another warm weather vacation planned.  Just saying

getting my groove

I don't love to work out and will usually find any excuse not to but I have really been stepping it up the last 2 weeks.  And today.............dare I even say...I looked forward to going to the Y.  I finally figured out that I can almost comfortably read while I am on the elliptical machine.  So now, even if there is nothing  good on tv, which lately has been the case while I am working out, now I can read!!  Woo hoo.  I don't know why this was such a break through for me today but it was and now I think I am really going to enjoy my 40 minutes of uninterrupted reading.  I haven't had that since Jack was born. :)  Oh and because the weather has been colder and my boys are going all wwf on eachother they are actually liking the playroom at the Y.  It is nice for them to have "new" toys to play with or be rough with for a little while.  Oh and I just started a book that I can't believe I haven't read yet.  No one told me how good this was.  I mean I guess I should have gathered that from all of it's time on the New York Times bestseller list and all but I guess I am a little behind.  I might be the last one to pick up this book:

I am only on page 24 and so into it already that I am really looking forward to getting back to the Y again tomorrow for some more reading oops I mean working out.   Has anyone else read this book?  Did you love it?  Does anyone else like to read while they work out? 

crabby pants

Umm Hello there.  I miss you little blog and your imaginary audience.  I just wish I had something interesting to say.  Lately not so much.  At least not happy fuzzy things and isn't that all you want are the happy, fuzzy, funny stories.

Alas, I don't have any happy, fuzzy, funny.   I have been pretty crabby.  Everything seems to be bugging me lately.  My dogs are always wrestling and fighting.  Why can't they just lay on their dog bed and chew on their own things not the kid's things. (Since writing this, I have had to take 3 of the boys toys away from Tucker.  I don't even know how he is getting them little houdini dog)

Mackenzie is a senior this year and that is kind of bumming me out............I mean, my Gosh, she is a senior people!  

John is bothering me and he is a good husband and father.  I guess I am just a mean mean mean wife.

I am having a hard time with Jack still pooping in his pull up every night.  Sometimes right after he has sat on the toilet for a half hour.  WHY?????????  Is it a power struggle.  By the way, most of the time I think he has come so far and the words autism spectrum almost never creep into my brain but when he and Charley had their well child appointments a week ago....................well, he was very different.  He knocked Dr. Howard's bag down and tried to grab her i-pad out of her hands and when she asked him a question he spoke in kookas.(what I call his made up language)I was so mad and embarrassed because I want her to know how well he is doing overall.  But she was really nice and said that it was probably the high anxiety he was feeling.  He was self-soothing with his hand in his mouth the whole time.  It is just so frustrating to have a child that you know and everyone else knows is different but you just don't have a name for it yet.  Don't know why.

Charley has been an adorable 3 year old for the most part lately.  I am really loving this 3 year old little boy. He has his moments too when he is stubborn and must do everything his way.  "I DO  I DO IT"  But he really is sweet and cuddly still.

Me, not so cute but maybe cuddly because I have only lost one lb so far since the last time I wrote about my weight.  I have been managing about 3 times to the Y a week but I have also been managing to eat as though I am on the high school boy's wrestling team.  I don't know why I am doing the self sabotage but I am.

So basically, I think I am in need of a good counselor.  Will you be my counselor blogspot?   I really hate counseling but I do feel like since I have been off the anti-depressants.............I am just not a nice person.  I really do not want to go back on them either.  The brain zaps I had from coming off of them are still too recent in my memory.  The other idea I had because I really don't believe that I am just naturally a mean crabby person is that I have been taking ambien to fall asleep pretty regularly.  Maybe that is affecting my mood somehow?  Ahhhh, but I love how easily it is to fall asleep after taking that little pretty white pill.  No racing thoughts, no worries about money, bad job, crabby self.  Just sweet  I can't posssibly keep my eyes open anymore sleep.  hmmmmmmmm

Mackenzie

               

My sweet Jack man

 

 

I don't want to sound too melancholy.  Things really are pretty good.  I am just crabbier then I should be and things are getting on my nerves more than they should.  And I am trying to address it with myself before it gets out of hand.  So I hope this doesn't sound all wah wah but I love my family and I just wish I wasn't so crabby.  Grrrrr

Jackisms

Today I was walking ahead of Jack and he said "Mom, you are missing something.........me."

sunny or cloudy

pretend that this picture is rotated to the right.

 

 

That is what it looks like outside here today.  You couldn't ask for a more beautiful sunny day for November 2nd.  Right?

picture from storm one week ago

 The second picture is how I feel on the inside today.  I just hate everything about myself today and feel like I could just sit and have a big long cry.  For some reason I can't make the tears come so I am just left with all of these emotions rolling around inside of me like those clouds in the picture.  Have you ever felt like you just wanted to be someone else?  Not necessarily a feeling of jealousy but just this huge feeling of "if I were so and so everything would be perfect, I would be happy all the time if I looked like her or if I had her house or her husband or her job".  Maybe those are things that you usually outgrow in middle school or Hell, I don't know even grade school.  I have never outgrown them.  Sometimes it is better than other times.  The first time I am really conscious of feeling that way was after my mom died when I was 9.  I don't know if I ever had those feeling before but I sure had them after that day.  Even as soon as the week she died.  My dad has a twin sister that has 3 daughters all within a years age of me and my 2 sisters.  We stayed at my aunt's house the week of my mom's funeral and I remember feeling so strongly that I just wish that I was one of my cousins.  Why couldn't I just be them and not have to be this strange motherless kid.  That was probably normal then but it has never really stopped with me.  Now I do the same things with my friends or people I don't even really know.  I am really into some of the wonderful blogs out there and I love to read them.  But after I read them I have a huge feeling of...........I don't know, I guess let's call it what it is, JEALOUSY.  I want their houses, I want their hair, I want their clothes, I want my husband to be more like theirs.  Ahhhh, I hate it.  I just want to be happy with myself and sometimes I don't know if it will ever happen.  There are the obvious changes I can make; work out, eat better, save money, find a job that makes me feel less worthless.  All good things and reasonably easy.  There is also this............

magic happy pill?

I haven't been on an anti-depressant for a couple of months now.  Should I go back or stay on this path and hope that it eventually gets better especially if I add exercise and other changes to the mix.  I am kind of going for the latter because I know how hard it is to come off of those drugs and they never seem to be this magic happy pill for me anyway.  Maybe I should try the counseling thing again.  I don't know the last one I had was kind of kooky.  If it was quiet the silence was so painfully uncomfortable I thought I was going to crawl out of my skin. 

I hope someday I look back at this post and give myself a big hug and say wow, look how far you've come and you are so worth it Nicole.  I have no idea why you didn't feel worth all the great things in the world.  ~~~~ Besides the fact that I need to feel that, my kids need me to be strong and happy and positive.  Especially Jack.  I saw him with the regular pre-k kids last Friday for his Halloween party and that kid is already going to have it harder.  The least I can do is try and let that sad little 9 year old girl that I was go and look around me and see all the blessings that I have now. 

loose ends

 

Charley waiting patiently at post office

1. Yeah!! My passport is being processed finally!  John found a website to get my birth certificate from South Dakota and I finally went to the post office last week.  Fairly painless except for the $135 fee.  Ouch.  I'd rather buy something for the house for that price.  Not an ugly picture.  The only mistake I made was that I thought I had to bring 2 color photos of my own with me.  The directions just said "two recent color photographs"  hmm so I found a couple of me that weren't two fugly and had them print over at Walgreens in the wallet size.  I was so proud of myself for thinking they needed to be small.  So after going to walgreens to pick up ugly pictures of myself, Charley and I headed over to the post office and waited in line.  When it was our turn I handed over proudly my birth certificate, filled out paperwork, and photos.  Uh oh, wrong photos.  They have to be special passport photos.  So I loaded Charley back up and ran across the street to Meijers.  The girl takes my photo and tells me I can't smile and that my ears have to be showing.  What?  Why would my ears have to be showing?  But I pulled back my hair as much as I could and hoped that my chubby chipmunk cheeks wouldn't block my ears.  You could see a sliver of them in the finished photo.  Oh well, I thought hope that is enough ear for them.   So got back to post office and unloaded Charley to wait in line again.  Everything was golden, except when I asked about my ears he laughed and said he never heard of that.  Oh well, I will have ears in my passport photo but at least I should definitely have it by December.  Can you hear my huge sigh of relief?

 


2.  My sweet puppy has a new home :(  I wanted to keep her so badly, but a good friend of mine who is a dog groomer knew of a girl who was looking for a puppy.  It is a good match and my sweet puppy left last weekend for her new forever home.  I have to keep telling myself to think with my head and not heart.  We already have 2 dogs that are at times (a lot) a handful.  If we kept her it would just really add to our stress level.  We sure don't need that.  Ultimately it is the best thing for puppy, she gets to be spoiled in her new home and the best thing for the 2 dogs we already have.  Still sad though :(


3. Weight loss is unmentionable right now.  Nonexistent.  Hasn't happened.  I decided yesterday though to start a food diary and to really keep track of the calories I consume.  The weird thing was that writing things down and counting the calories made me want to eat more.  I am like a rebellious teenager when I try to take control of my eating.  There is this naughty part of me that just doesn't want to be controlled.  I don't know what would be better?  Like should I just make sure to exercise at least 5 days a week and just eat healthier and try not to obsess about it SO much.  I feel like the obsessing about every calorie and every pound I am not losing is just sabotaging me.  It sounds so easy but for some reason I just can't.  I haven't even been to the gym since the whole "runner's knee" thing.  My knees feel fine now, so there is no reason now to avoid the gym.


4. I can't think of anything else to tie up right now.  I am trying to spend more time reading because a.) I love reading and b.) I could really give up some of my computer and television time.   So I will tell you what I am reading right now and maybe it will spur me on to read faster so I can tell you if I liked it and then tell you about my next book.  Right now I am reading Orange is the New Black.  About a girl who was arrested on some minor drug charges and has to do time in a federal prison.  It is pretty good so far.  I am  reading it on my e-reader and for some reason it is taking me a lot longer than it would if it were a book I cold hold in my hands and turn actual pages.


That's it for now, Happy Halloween!  I will hopefully have some good pictures and stories to post from tonight.

 

 

Monday blues

Our week has started out kind of rough.  Normally we can get until at least Wednesday morning before the meltdowns start.  I don't know what it is but this kid HATES school.  As soon as you wake him up he starts yelling "no school today, it's Friday!" (he doesn't have school on Fridays)  It is heartbreaking to see his panic and extremely tiresome and frustrating.  He can't or won't articulate to me why he hates it so much.  It has been getting worse and it is only October :(  We had a home visit last Friday and his teacher said that he starts out the week pretty good but by Wednesday or Thursday he is kind of zoning out and having to get cued as to what to do more.  Ahhh so frustrating because we want him to do well and get the most out of this year.  I feel like this is our make or break it year as far can we get him in with the regular kids?  He is with them for most of the day right now but I am not sure how that is going yet.  Our meeting on Friday was with the Early Childhood teacher (special ed) and we don't meet with the regular kindergarten teacher until November 4th.  The testing that they have been doing so far this year shows him still way behind on his fine motor skills.  He's a little behind on the following directions part too.  My goal now is to make sure we work on something at home a few times a day.  Some days I think I get into lazy mode and just go about our normal routine without making sure he gets a little extra from me.  I have to remember that Jack is different and everything is going to take a little more from all of us.  I can't just auto pilot parent with him.  Obviously, he is struggling, I am sure that is why he doesn't want to go.  Jack has never liked being out of his comfort zone.  Me either for that matter.

Fall slides in

John and I had a money and budget talk this morning and tried to figure out just how many extra hours a week that I should be picking up at work to make all our ends meet.  Ahhhhh, it was not a fun talk.  No fun feelings afterwards either.   So since the day was a perfect fall day we decided to head out to Robinettes and get some hot apple cider and warm donuts.  They have the best.  They don't have their own pumpkin patch there so we left without pumpkins for today.  There is a local pumpkin patch that I will take the boys to next weekend.  I want them to have the experience of picking and choosing their own pumpkin.  Not just pointing at an odd shaped one in a box.  Jack was a little mad that we weren't leaving with any pumpkins.  I believe his exact words were "I'm going home with nothing!"  Oh poor baby.

Jack checking out the lay of the land

 

 

 

 

 

The ugly pumpkins are only $40 and we can talk about the unhappy looking kids

 

 Where are those donuts and cider you promised me.

There we go :)

 

Even he likes them

Hide your donuts from the big people

 

Uh-oh looks like a Speed sequel

 This driver looks a little devious

 poser

The end, off to grocery shop with 2 tired kids :)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Patellofemoral Pain Syndrome

Who gets runner's knee after running twice and working out only 3 times?  Me, Yeah me.  Great

My knees have been bugging me for over a week.  And by bugging me, I mean killing me.  Two weeks ago I worked out at the Y three times in one week. Woo hoo.  I did the elliptical which I feel like I can do forever and it burns a lot of calories, which is what I am looking for since I have about 45lbs I want to lose like yesterday.  Two of the days after I did my time on the elliptical I went over to the treadmill and alternated running and walking.  My knees started hurting pretty much right away but I just assumed I overdid it.  So, I stayed away from the Y all last week and took it easy on my knees.  Practically overdosing on ibuprofen all week. 

I saw my doctor yesterday and she diagnosed me with Patellofemoral Pain Syndrome.........or runner's knee.  Come on, I barely even worked out yet.  We have a wedding in December to go to and I don't want to be the big girl on the beach.  My doctor said to stay off the elliptical for awhile and walk on the treadmill not run until it gets better.  She also suggested taking a pilates class so I am going to check into some classes at the Y.  I have always wanted to try a class but I am not very coordinated and I have a thing about being in a class full of fit women who already know what they are doing.  I know, grow up already and get some confidence, right?  Well, maybe these knees will push me into going.  I really want to lose weight and everyone says that yoga and pilates really work your core so I think I will give it a shot.


Last night I went out with some girls from work.  We met for a movie and then we went out for drinks and played some pool.  It was so much fun but I probably should have stopped after the movie.  I just wanted to have a couple of drinks but once I started it didn't seem like I could stop.  This is probably a problem I will have to visit at some other time but I don't think I am going to go there now.  It was a fun night...........I have just been paying for it all day today.  John left early today to go hang out at his uncles and watch the U of M vs.MI State game.  Mackenzie was gone today so it was just me and the boys.  It was really a nice day.  They played outside forever and then took a long bath and then I let them watch Sesame Street on my bed.  That worked out fine until wrestle mania started.  They get so rough with each other.  Boys   John is staying over at his uncles for the night so the best part of they day?   I have the bed to myself again.  Nothing against my husband but sometimes just being able to have the whole bed to spread my books and computer on and to be able to watch as much cheesy tv in bed until I fall asleep is just priceless.

Before the wrestling or maybe during a break?

 Charley smothering Jack

funky funk

Do you remember her from a few weeks ago?  Isn't she too cute?  She is a spunky 6 weeks old right now.  I am so in love with this little puppy.....which is not good because we already have 2 dogs.  An ex-boyfriend of one of my sisters wants her.  He has come over to see her a few times but now I don't know if I can part with her.  Common sense tells me I do NOT want 3 dogs.  The sucky thing is that I usually go with my stupid heart on such matters.  I kind of feel like Tyler and Caitlyn on Teen Mom.  I know what is best for baby but it is going to be so hard for me.



It has been a busy week here at the Larkin's.  John's friend Brad from high school is getting married in December and we had their couple's shower on Saturday.  It was interesting..............for the most part everyone sat upstairs in a living room watching college football.  Since I am really not a fan of college football I felt kind of lost.  I kept wandering around the house hoping to find someone else that just wanted to have a drink and maybe a smoke (Mad Men style) but there were no takers until just about the time I had planned on leaving.  We had a babysitter at our house and it was the first time anyone outside of Mackenzie or John's mom had watched the boys.  It was also the first time we paid someone hourly to watch the boys and since she had arrived at our house at 3:30 we were getting up there in numbers by the time the party started getting fun.  I left John at the party and got home to a very quiet house.  So so so nice.  I got on my jammies and went to bed in our king sized bed all by myself.  Well, with 3 little dogs.  The boys must have had fun with Becca because I woke up to "bayee seeeeter,  bayee seeeeeter, where are yew?"  When I went in to get Charley he said "no, not yew mommy."  I guess we will have to get a babysitter more often.

Speaking of John's friend who is getting married..............well, the wedding is in Mexico and we are going.  Instead of paying for a big ole wedding they are going to pay for a few of their close friends to go along with.  I have never been out of the country though so I am just now in the process of trying to get my passport.  Of course now I can't find my birth certificate anywhere and you kind of need that for the whole proof of U.S. citizenship and everything.  AAAAHHH  I have been trying to call the records office in South Dakota and as of today still haven't gotten a live person.   I have to work all day tomorrow so Friday is going to be the big birth certificate search here while having a phone glued to my ear to try and obtain another one in case I can't find the one I know I just saw a few months ago when I had no reason to need it.  Wish me luck. 

randomly random

Well this is going to be a post full of randoms. I have been meaning to write much sooner but in classic Nicole form, I have been putting it off. I haven't been doing this for very long but I know that once I finish a post I feel this sense of accomplishment. Whether the post was pulitzer prize material doesn't matter to me. It just feels good to get some thoughts down and makes me reflect a little on how I can handle things differently in my house. Whether it was a great week or not.  I'm sure I can always use a little reflection.

This last week has just been kind of weird. I feel like I have done a lot of yelling of my 2 little ones and nitpicked and grew very annoyed of my older daughter and my husband John. It seemed like everything the big people in this house did just got on my nerves. Charley got yelled at more this week because he is just sweet and full of energy at 3.........but gosh darn it does he have to dump every bucket of toys out and then drag things from room to room. Also, getting into anything that he is not supposed to the minute my back is turned or I happen to be on a 5 minute phone call during the day. Geesh! But I promise to make more one on one time with him this next week and work on projects with him.

Jack, Jack, Jack. I have really lost it on him this week. I feel like the worst mother in the world with him right now. Last year we had him tested for autism and he did not fit on their spectrum so that is good, right? Well, he did fall a little bit below developement wise. About a year. So okay, potty training for him was late but now that is great. He can even stay dry overnight. The thing with him right now is going number 2. He has not done that in the toilet since last July when we were at my parents house. Otherwise it is usually at night. Sometimes we don't find it until morning and the poor weird kid has slept in it all night. How can he sleep like that? I know all the books say not to shame your kid about this or they will be messed up forever. I am just getting tired of rinsing out disgusting underwear everyday and cleaning up a large 5 year old child. And why is he doing this? I know he can do it on the potty. We have seen it or was it a dream. I am not sure anymore. This last week though I went crazy and took all of his beloved books away and told him he can have one back everytime he poos in the potty. I'm afraid to say that none of this was said or done lovingly. I was mad and I shouldn't have let him see me that way. I am just at such a loss on this one. :((((


We have had some good times this week. Art prize is going on right now downtown so we headed out there on Sunday. We didn't get to see even half of the stuff but it was still fun. We randomly ran into these people.

                                                          My sister Angie

                                                           My sweet niece Taylor

 

 

 

Also, today was the 3rd week of Charley's sports sampler at the Y.  Today was floor hockey.  I think he liked it but it is kind of hard to tell he doesn't follow direction very well and would rather sit by me and watch.  But he sure is cute :)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So here is to this week going smoother............less yelling, drinking(might have been me)more fun and planned activities.  And above all patience with Jack and his bowel issues.  We will overcome this him and I and I will not shame him again. 

Charley sports and my lack of

One of the reasons I wanted to start this blog was to kind of hold myself accountable for my decision to get healthy and to finally get serious about working out and losing weight. I subscribed to the great website "from the couch to 5K" and I am proud to say that I have started it. Well, okay............... to be honest, I have visualized myself running. I have been shopping for my new running outfits, because let's be serious here, it is really all about the shopping and clothes for me. The idea of running is exciting, fun, and nerve wrecking for me. If I am going to do it ( I will, eventually) I am going to need the best, cutest running clothes I can find. Hmmmph, haven't found them yet. So anyway, we are over month into my vow of living healthier and I really can't say that I have started yet. My only trip to the gym since then has been for Charley. We signed him him up for a sports sampler at the Y. He seemed to love it. Here are a couple videos of him playing basketball and just to let you know, once I find THE outfit, I will start running. :)

Charley is 3, allergies, and the zoo, oh yeah

 

I can’t believe Charley is 3 already.  How can that possibly be?  Birthdays always hit me kind of hard for some crazy reason.  I just hate measurements in time,  it just makes you realize how fast time goes I guess.  Not helping the issue is that my oldest just turned 18 in August and I had my 37th birthday.  yuck, yuck, and yuck.  Also, Charley is my sweet baby.  Is the last though?  I don’t want him to be…….I’m not ready for that.  I have always thought there would be at least one more baby in my life.  So, have I cherished every possible, precious, fleeting moment of the last 3 years?  I hope so, I really do.  This blog is going to be part of the insurance that I do just that.  My kids say so many cute things and do so many cute things and I just want to make sure I remember as many of these sweet days as possible.  Sometimes I have a flair for the morbid thoughts.  Like dwelling on how fast it is going instead of living in today and just loving today for what today is.  Wonderful!!!  Here are a couple more shots of the birthday boy.

 

 

 

Anyway I think Charley had a great birthday.  We kind of spread out the gifts through out the day.  He had the cupcakes that he covets every time we walk by them at Meijer.  It was really low key, just our immediate little family.  Very nice day, considering the boys and I are a little under the weather.  It all started last Monday morning when Jack came busting out of his bedroom in the morning shouting…..”somebody, help my brother! He is turning into a dog!” Charley was having an asthma attack and when that happens he sounds like a barking seal.  It is kind of scary if you have never heard it before…..or if you are a 5 year old with a very literal sense about you.  So the boys have pretty bad allergies right now and mine turned into a sinus infection.  Fun times, if you see green snot in any of the following pictures at the zoo, please just ignore.  We are trying to be on top of it but man can those little boys fight a kleenex wipe.

 

Today has been an absolutely beautiful September day and I realized that we had never made it to our local zoo all summer.  John was on an all day bike ride so it was just me and the kids and we had so much fun.  I am glad we made it.  Here are some pictures.

 

Mackenzie and Charley

 

These were some really cute little kangaroo type animals. 

 

Jack loved the kid’s petting zoo. 

 

Mackenzie and Charley

 

Jack and his goat friend

 

I thought he would freak out in this bird enclosure but he was really cool about it.

 

Charley was a little more skeptical of this whole plan

 

Check them all out!!!

 

Mackenzie touching a sting ray, ooh

 

All of us together :)

 

Outside of the lion exhibit, this was way more exciting trust me.

 

Charley and his little buddy

 

Ice cream at the end of the day, I won’t show you a picture of me chowing down on mine. :)